Subjunctive KoL: ZombieSpoilers

Citizens of Loathing, the Council needs your help! They have discovered that the plague introduced to the Kingdom on Columbus Day (see ColumbusDaySpoilers) will turn the entire population of the Kingdom into Zombies! Fortunately, the temporal rifts which have appeared throughout the Kingdom (see TemporalRifts) allow you to travel to the Kingdom 28 days later and fight the zombie population in the hopes that you can collect ingredients the Council can use to make a cure.

There is a new temporal rift in the Council, which will take you to Seaside Town 28 Days Later (you cannot leave the town). The town has mostly been reduced to rubble, with the Hall of Records replaced by a Hall of Braaaaains, and three adventurable areas left:

• Market Square
• The Mall of Loathing
• Wrong Side of the Tracks

In each area, you will find denizens of the Kingdom which have been reduced to mindless zombies. The zombies appear to be functionally identical to their pre-zombie forms, with one exception: they occasionally drop a zombie pineal gland. (I suspect that all zombies drop a pineal gland, but the list below only includes drops I've personally seen.) The details for each area (in ascending order of difficulty) are:

• Market Square, 28 Days Later
• drunken zombie half-orc hobo (1 HP, 1 XP; dirty hobo gloves, Mad Train wine, moxie weed, zombie pineal gland; +0 meat)
• fiendish zombie can of asparagus (1 HP, 1 XP; asparagus knife, razor-sharp can lid, stalk of asparagus, zombie pineal gland; +4-5 meat)
• zombie Gnollish crossdresser (5 HP, 2-3 XP; frilly skirt, maiden wig, zombie pineal gland; +20-25 meat)
• Zombie Knob Goblin Assistant Chef (1 HP, 1 XP; chef's hat, Knob Goblin pants, Knob Goblin tongs, zombie pineal gland; +7-8 meat)
• zombie yeast beast (8 HP, 3-4 XP; 2 wads of dough, zombie pineal gland; +0 meat)
• The Mall of Loathing, 28 Days Later
• white zombie (21 HP, 7-8 XP; piece of wedding cake, zombie pineal gland; +26-34 meat)
• zombie apathetic lizardman (12 HP, 4 XP; +10 Apathy, zombie pineal gland; 20-22 Meat)
• Zombie Clown (15 HP, 3-4 XP; big red clown nose, bloody clown pants, long skinny balloon, zombie pineal gland; 23-29 Meat)
• zombie frat boy (30 HP, 8-9 XP; bottle of tequila, homoerotic frat-paddle, ice-cold beer, zombie pineal gland; +25-34 Meat)
• zombie hippy (30 HP, 8-9 XP; filthy corduroys, windchimes, zombie pineal gland; +0 meat)
• zombie zmobie (11 HP, 4 XP; loose teeth, cranberries, zombie pineal gland; +35-41 meat)
• The Wrong Side of the Tracks, 28 Days Later
• scary pirate (59 HP, 13-14 XP; charrrm, snakehead charrrm, zombie pineal gland; +40-47 Meat)
• Zombie eXtreme Snowboarding Orc (65 HP, 14-15 XP; Mountain Stream Soda, zombie pineal gland; +38-42 Meat)
• Zombie Goth Giant (150 HP, 26 XP; thin black candle, Warm Subject gift certificate, awful poetry journal, zombie pineal gland; +148-170 Meat)
• Zombie N00b (69 HP, 15-16 XP; 33398 scroll, draggin' ball hat, zombie pineal gland; +31-40 Meat)
• Zombie Quiet Healer (90 HP, 19 XP; scroll of drastic healing, soft green echo eyedrop antidote, zombie pineal gland; +100-111 Meat)

To complete the quest, take the zombie pineal glands to Doc Galaktik. He'll be able to convert the pineal glands into loaded serum blowguns, which you can use to cure and inoculate yourself or others against the Gray Plague. (You get an empty blowgun after using the serum.)