Subjunctive KoL   Subjunctive KoL: CocktailCrafting
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The cocktailcrafting system is much more systematic than it was before (not that this is saying much, as it wasn't systematic at all before). The basics are as follows:

There are 6 basic kinds of booze (gin, run, tequila, vodka, whiskey, and wine), 6 common fruits (grapefruit, lemon, olive, orange, soda water [which is a fruit for purposes of this discussion], and strawberry), and 3 uncommon fruits (cherry, jumbo olive, and lime). Each of the boozes combines with precisely 2 of the common fruits and 1 of the uncommon fruits, for a total of 12 common drinks and 6 uncommon drinks. Got it so far?

There are also 3 drink accessories: coconut shells, little paper umbrellas, and magical ice cubes. Each drink accessory combines with exactly 4 of the common drinks to make an upgraded drink, though making these drinks requires Advanced Cocktailcrafting. Finally, there are the sword drinks. You can skewer an uncommon fruit with a tiny plastic sword to make a skewered fruit, and then combine the skewered fruit with either of the 2 rare drinks using that fruit to make a tiny plastic sword drink. Make sense? If not, it's all spelled out in the charts below. Rare ingredients or drinks made from rare ingredients are listed in italics.

The stat gains from drinks also follow a systematic pattern. The "common" drinks give a small gain in one stat depending on the fruit used (oranges and lemons yield Muscle, soda water and grapefruit yield Mysticality, and olives and strawberries yield Moxie), while the "uncommon" drinks give a gain twice as large (lime is Muscle, cherry is Mysticality, and jumbo olive is Moxie). Adding an accessory to a drink introduces a larger gain in a second stat dependent on the accessory used (coconuts are Muscle, little paper umbrellas are Mysticality, and ice cubes are Moxie), while making a sword drink doubles the effectiveness of the fruit (not surprising, since another fruit was used in the process of making a sword drink). Note that the total gain from a drink with an accessory is the same regardless of whether the gain is all in one stat or divided between two.

Superhuman Cocktailcrafting adds another layer of complexity to the pattern. Using Nash Crosby's Still, one can change the basic kinds of booze and common fruits to improved versions (this can be done ten times a day). These improved versions can be cocktailcrafted with each other -- again, each improved booze combines with precisely 2 of the improved fruits for a total of 12 drinks. The stat gains depend on the fruit used, exactly like the unimproved versions (kiwis and kumquats give Muscle, tangerines and tonic water give Mysticality, and cocktail onions and raspberries give Moxie). Finally, each drink accessory can combine with exactly 4 of the improved drinks to make upgraded drinks, with the stat gains again determined by the original gain and the new gain from the accessory. The rare fruits (cherry, jumbo olive, and lime) are not used in Superhuman Cocktailcrafting.

The booze can all be found in the same places. The common fruits can be bought in stores, while the uncommon fruits require adventuring. The drink accessories are found at the Shore (or can be created by Advanced Cocktailcrafting), while the tiny plastic swords can only be found in Crimbo stockings.

The basic boozes, while there are plenty of places to find them normally, can also be crafted (in batches of three) by fermenting the appropriate ingredient. Three of these are available from the Hippy Store if you complete the quest on the frat side, while the other three are found in various other places around the Kingdom.

There are also some older drinks which don't fit into the system, and can't be improved (i.e. they can't have a drink accessory or skewered fruit added to them). These are listed in a separate category below.

Exploded drinks: Occasionally, after making a large number of drinks (somewhere in the neighborhood of 100), your bartender-in-the-box will explode. When this happens, you will get some random drinks, including some drinks that cannot be made any other way.

Nash Crosby's Still

To use the Still, you must have the Superhuman Cocktailcrafting skill and access to the Moxie guild.

Using the Still improves the basic boozes as follows:

and the basic mixers as follows:

Basic Booze (3 drunkenness)

Upgraded Booze (3 drunkenness)

Basic Mixed Drinks (3 drunkenness)

Muscle drinks (lemon, orange, lime):

Mysticality drinks (grapefruit, soda water, cherry):

Moxie drinks (olive, strawberry, jumbo olive):

Upgraded Mixed Drinks (3 drunkenness)

Making these drinks requires Superhuman Cocktailcrafting.

Muscle drinks (kiwi, kumquat):

Mysticality drinks (tangerine, tonic water):

Moxie drinks (cocktail onion, raspberry):

Advanced Cocktailcrafting Drinks (4 drunkenness)

Making these drinks requires the Disco Bandit skill Advanced Cocktailcrafting. The ones above the horizontal lines are made from the Basic Mixed Drinks, while the ones below the line are made from the Upgraded Mixed Drinks. Note that adding an accessory to the Upgraded Mixed Drinks requires only Advanced Cocktailcrafting, not Superhuman Cocktailcrafting.

Coconut drinks:

Umbrella drinks:

Iced drinks:

Sword Drinks (6 drunkenness)

Fermented Drinks (1 drunkenness)

Mushroom Wines (3 drunkenness)

Tier 1 Tier 2 Tier 3 Tier 4

Other Drinks and Recipes

Miscellaneous recipes:

Miscellaneous drinks:

Mafia wines (can only be obtained through the Mafia raffles):

Exploded drinks:

Undrinkables

There are some drinks which appear to be alcoholic beverages, but which cannot actually be consumed. This includes two special drinks created for clans, as well as eight drinks which made with the magical ice cube with a fly in it (a joke item from McPhee's Grimoire). Note that these follow the recipe for the normal drink using the magical ice cubes, but do not require any special skills to make — anyone can make the drinks with a magical ice cube with a fly in it. Hilarious!